


State of Grace

by summerpinksky



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:33:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25279303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/summerpinksky/pseuds/summerpinksky
Summary: It has been more than seven years since his divorce, and Doyoung is still scrambling his way into putting his life back together.Ten years after he left without saying goodbye, Jaehyun comes back into Doyoung’s life.Doyoung’s plate is full — he has a business to run and a nine-year-old son to look after and care for, all the while trying to finish his college degree. He doesn’t have time to waste on regretting his life choices or dwelling on the past.And Jaehyun, well.Jaehyun has been in love with Doyoung all his life.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung
Comments: 8
Kudos: 45





	State of Grace

Doyoung can’t help the smile blossoming on his face as he makes his way outside. The rest of his friends are sprawled all over the place in all different types of inebriation in one of the big rooms of the villa. But he can’t be bothered about Johnny drunk confessing to Taeyong, or of the fact that Taeil is going to kill him tomorrow at the wedding for letting him consume two bottles of wine all by himself when he has to sing.

None of that matters when his best friend is waiting for him outside.

Jaehyun is leaning against his car looking at his phone when Doyoung sees him. Doyoung tries to school his face into a scolding expression before pushing the gate open. Jaehyun looks up and smiles at him. Doyoung finds himself wanting to run into his arms. But instead, he crosses his arms as he walks towards him.

“You’re not supposed to see the bride before the wedding.”

Jaehyun smirks at him as he straightens up and pockets his phone. “Are you the bride then?” he says teasingly as he opens the passenger door.

Doyoung smacks him on the shoulder before getting in, murmuring a “Shut up, you’re late.”

☆

They’ve been driving for a good five minutes before Doyoung thought to asks, “So where exactly are you taking me?”

His best friend just smiles at him and replies, “Don’t worry, I won’t let you be late for your wedding.”

He decided then that it’s no use asking. He knows from experience that Jaehyun won’t tell him anything no matter how much he pesters him and honestly he doesn’t really mind. So he fills the space between them with stories about the stag party instead.

They were laughing about Doyoung telling him about Yuta dancing to Mirotic in his boxer shorts on top of the coffee table when Jaehyun parks the car. Doyoung was busy trying not to die laughing while telling the story that he didn’t notice that they’ve arrived on the beach. He got out as Jaehyun turns the ignition off.

The wind is freezing but the sky is filled with stars. And the world seems to be lulled to sleep by the gentle sounds of the waves.

“I can’t believe this is your wedding gift to me,” Doyoung says but his tone is playful. “When you texted me that you’re going to give me my wedding gift early I thought you’d at least give me plane tickets to some fancy island or something.”

Jaehyun just softly laughs from where he’s standing by the car. Doyoung rolls his eyes at him and turns to look at the stars instead. This isn’t too bad actually. He’s been stressed out the past few weeks with the wedding planning and stuff that he badly needed some quiet time. He smiles because _of course_ , his best friend would know what he needed best without him having to spell it out.

He closes his eyes and tries to empty his mind to the sound of the waves. His moment is interrupted when Jaehyun comes over and embraces him from behind.

“Are you cold?” Jaehyun whispers.

Doyoung shakes his head, a small smile on his lips. “You’re warm.” He felt Jaehyun wrap his arms tighter around him as he said those words.

“I actually just wanted to spend more time with you,” his voice is a gentle breath against the side of Doyoung’s neck. “I feel like this is the last time I’ll be able to do this with you.”

“Hey,” Doyoung can’t help but frown at that. “Don’t say that. I told you, didn’t I? Nothing will change between us, Jaehyun.”

Jaehyun chuckles but it sounded sad. “I don’t think your husband would appreciate me taking you away for a joyride at 2 am without his permission.”

“Just because we’ll be legally each other’s other half doesn’t make him the boss of me, Jaehyun. I am my own person. I don’t need his permission to hang out with my best friend. And I never will.”

“Of course, you are.” He felt more than heard the smile on Jaehyun’s lips as he buried his face at the back of Doyoung’s neck.

They stayed like this for a few more minutes; basking in the silence of the world while being wrapped around each other’s warmth. Doyoung always felt the safest in Jaehyun’s arms.

☆

It’s an hour after sunrise when they got back to the estate where the wedding will be held. Jaehyun turns off the ignition but none of them made a move to get out of the car.

Doyoung doesn’t understand but the silence between them now felt fragile, and he doesn’t know how to maneuver his way around it. He’s aware that he has to go back and get ready for his big day, but there’s a part of him that doesn’t want to go out of the car yet. It weirdly feels like his time with Jaehyun is running out and he’s not ready to let go of it yet. Which he realizes is pretty stupid since his best friend will be at the wedding, of course. But he still feels a little off.

He turns to his best friend only to find that Jaehyun is already looking at him. His unreadable expression unsettles something inside Doyoung. He was about to ask him if something’s wrong when Jaehyun beats him to it.

“Doyoung-ah, you’re happy, aren’t you?”

It’s an easy enough question. And the answer should’ve come to him easily given the way his life is going. He’s getting married to his long-time boyfriend in a few hours and he’s studying something he really likes in his chosen university.

He is happy.

He _should_ be.

But why was he hesitating?

“Jaehyun,” his voice is a whisper and he doesn’t understand why he said his name instead of giving him the affirmative to his question.

“I don’t care about anything else, Doyoung. As long as you’re happy.” He reaches between them and intertwines their hands. Jaehyun places a small kiss at the back of Doyoung’s hand before he looks back at him, “I want nothing else for you but to be happy.”

“Jaehyun…”

“Are you happy, Doyoung?”

Something burns at the back of Doyoung’s throat. And for a brief moment, he lets himself be filled with everything he feels for Jaehyun. He looks at him and doesn’t reprimand himself when he opens an age-old fantasy of walking down the aisle with Jaehyun at the other side waiting for him. He knows it isn’t fair to his soon-to-be-husband, but for the last time, he lets himself want something he can never have.

He lets himself be brave and pulls their intertwine hands to him and leaves a kiss of his own at the back of Jaehyun’s hand.

“I am happy,” he softly whispers, looking at their entwined hands instead of in Jaehyun’s direction. “I will be happy.”

He lets himself imprint this feeling of Jaehyun’s hand in his before he tucks it away again. He squeezes their hands and let go. This time he looks Jaehyun in the eyes. “I need to go. I have a wedding to prepare for.”

His best friend nods at him and he didn’t let himself overanalyzed the look on Jaehyun’s face before he opens the passenger door and got out of the car. But there is still a nagging feeling twisting his gut. And so before he can change his mind, he looks back to him.

“You’re going to be at the wedding, right?” Doyoung blames the lack of sleep for such a stupid and unreasonable question. Of course, Jaehyun is going to be at his wedding. There was no doubt about it.

_Right?_

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Jaehyun says but why did it feel like a goodbye to Doyoung’s ears.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are appreciated <3
> 
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